Conception

once upon a time
a young girl
gave herself
to a labour of love,
a labour
characterised by struggle,
the eternal struggle
between darkness
and light,
the struggle that light
and truth
wholeness
and beauty
were destined
eventually
to win

the battle
between exquisite peace
and sword piercing pain
that began to reveal its destiny
through the young girl’s
labour

quietly
secretly
imperceptibly
Light
was coming,
on its way
across time and space,
to make itself known

and it made its first appearance
with a sign
the shimmering ethereal
radiance
of an angel
bright
clear
unmistakable
softly entering
into an ordinary day

an angel who said
will you lend
your love
that God might birth
a greater Love
through you

and Mary said
yes

tell God

I say yes

Engagement

I want to meet
with Him,
this Christmas.

I want to engage
with that baby who was God,
connect
with the God
who came as child.

I want to experience him,
be loved by him,
and welcome him this Christmas.

I want to encounter
the new-born Christ
with every ounce of my emotions
every portion of my soul.

I want to anticipate nothing
and expect
more than I can possibly
imagine.

I really
want to meet with that baby
in a radically new way
this Christmas.

I’ll start

by kneeling …

Risk-Taking Saviour

risking it all
on the ‘yes’
of a Jewish teenager,
staking his plans
on the equally difficult ‘yes’
of a carpenter
disgraced,
breaking
social conventions

he came
with forgiving love

choosing to enter history
in the midst of political turmoil,
risking the dangerous anger
of a king
crazy for power

he came
as a helpless baby

conceiving himself
in the womb of a girl,
risking a difficult birth
in the dirt
of an animal stall

he came
with complete humility

seeking the costliest gift
he could bring
he offered us
simply
himself

entering human life
in all of its raw
and complex messiness

he came

because he cared

The Mystery

unlike any other
and yet
so much
like every other
newborn babe

the visible image
of the invisible God
suckled at the breast

drew his nourishment
from the one
whom he’d chosen
to mother him

utterly transcendent
wholly dependent
thoroughly human
completely divine

God
suckled at the breast

and Mary
once more
gave her body in love
and pondered
the mystery

This Baby

He challenges me
this baby:
I cannot kneel by his manger
and not
be changed,
I cannot gaze into those beautiful eyes
and stay the same,
I cannot hold him close
and fail to be aware
that his purpose in coming
is for him
to hold me,

I cannot welcome this new life
without acknowledging
that this baby
invites me
to radically new ways of being;

I simply cannot find the words
to express
how the coming of this child
challenges me
to change.

A Saviour is born
and life
will never be the same again.

He challenges me
this baby.

Safe

held in the Father’s arms
I am safe

soaked in the Father’s love
peace
permeates my tiredness

he knows

he knows everything about me
within
and without

he will restore me

all will be well

Deeper

deeper

deeper into my love
that’s where I want to take you

closer
closer to my heart
that’s where I long
to draw you

washed
washed in my blood
that’s how much I forgive you

healed
fully healed
that’s how I want to bless you

filled
filled with my Spirit
that’s how I
want to see you

the question is

will you let me do this
for you

The Yes of God

I stand in awe
of answered prayer
stand in complete humility
before God’s Yes

the definitive Yes
the radical Yes
the active, dynamic, creative Yes
the Yes that brings miracles
into being
before my very eyes

the Yes of God
that gives new strength
to crippled bones
restores sight to the sightless
shrinks tumours amazingly
into oblivion
regenerates organs lost to disease
reverses the death march of AIDS
and heals, and heals
and heals
today

miracle maker
creative healer
abundantly, wonderfully
gracious God
I stand in awe
of your Yes

Whispers From Within

whispers from within

prompt me

to stop
take space
to pause

give myself permission
to grow still

breathe in
his presence
drink in
his peace

centre myself
once more

in him

The Slate

Psalm 32

God
holds nothing
absolutely nothing
against you

the slate’s
wiped perfectly clean

from the moment
the confession
begins to pour from your lips
you are free

it is forgiven
total
complete
instantaneous

let it go

make a new start

the slate
is clean

Come Spirit, Come

Spirit of God
come

come
as the gentle whisper
come as the raging torrent
come as the roaring storm
come
in the quiet moment

come
in whatever way
will catch my attention today

but come, Spirit
come

Abide

John 15.4

abide in me

remain
in my love
let me hold you
enfold you
comfort you
nurture you
create in you
all that you might be

dwell
in my presence

rest there
remain there
abide

let me shower you with
blessing upon blessings
let me circle you
wash over you
cascade my love upon you

remain
in my love

abide

It's All For You

1 John 4.13-16

I am the complete expression
of love
greater by far
more consistent
than any other love
you’ll ever know
than any other love
that’s ever warmed
and touched your heart

imagine that
I am the complete expression of love
in all its fullness
love
as it was designed to be
wonderful
sustaining
forgiving
serving
perfect, perfect love

and I long to overwhelm you
with that love
to lavish it upon you
to swamp you with it
hold you in it
never
let you go

open your heart
to receive

there are no conditions
it’s all
for you
whatever you’ve done
whatever others
have done to you
however you’re feeling
right now
it’s all for you

open your heart
to receive

Eleventh Hour God

when the chips
are really down
and there’s
not much to believe in
and nowhere else to run

strengthen my belief, Lord

when the rubber hits the road
and puts me
to the biggest ever test

deepen my trust
trust in you
trust in self

when it all seems impossible
in simple human terms

remind me
nothing
is beyond your help

and when I’m asking
again and again
how long

whisper to me
tenderly

that you’re a
not in advance
just in time
precisely the best moment
eleventh hour
God

and miracles
happen

and you
will
hold me through

Yeshua Love

Ephesians 3.14-21

beyond my deepest need
or highest hope

able to encompass
and restore
all humankind

endless
stupendous
enfolding
upholding

astounding reach of love
at one with me

surrounding
indwelling
healing
empowering

the source of all that is
and all I am

forgiving
renewing
nurturing
enabling

drawing out potential
for the call

beyond me
within me
limitless
yet personal

seeing
all that’s needed for my life

loving
always loving
infinitely loving

loving
with a love that says

let’s dance

Silent Wisdom

in the silence
there is wisdom

in the silence
there is love

in the silence
is my healing

and in the silence
I dare to meet my deepest self

at one
with the Creator

Job Description

Jewish carpenter
seeks committed, enthusiastic amateur
for communications exercise.

No knowledge of working with wood needed.
No references required.
Previous history and experience
completely irrelevant.
Past integrity and moral values
also unimportant.

Full job description currently unavailable
but likely to unfold as the work progresses.

Applicant will almost certainly be
required to travel;
may have to leave behind the known, familiar
and must be prepared to take risks.
Helpful if able to leave at short notice.

The job will almost certainly require skills
that are outside the candidate’s current experience,
but everything that is required
will be provided.

Salary cannot be guaranteed
and on occasions may be below the statutory minimum
but applicants are assured
that any reimbursement
will be sufficient to meet their basic needs.

Discernment and listening skills are desirable for this post
but on the job training will be available.

The job is likely to be unpredictable and challenging
and to take the successful applicant in new directions.
This is a highly rewarding position
for which the only essential attribute required
is an ability to
believe wholeheartedly in the project.

All applicants welcomed
with open arms.

Infusion

rhythm
of the eternal

infuse me
transfuse me
cradle me here

rise up
from deep within
steep me
in yourself

Who Is He

who
is this man?

miracle maker
healer
shaker of the status quo

carpenter from Nazareth
or more than that?

who is this ordinary
extraordinary man?

freedom fighter
truth teller
charismatic Saviour

or simply
son of Mary?

who is
this enigmatic man?

challenger
disturber
compassionate one

confronter
forgiver

befriender of thieves

soul shaper
peacemaker
peace breaker?

unlike any other
and yet so much
like everyman


who
can he be?

rule breaker
covenant maker

lover
teacher
friend

divinity
embodied through humanity?

who exactly is
this special man?

and who is he

for me?

Kingdom Scars

streaked with the blood
of the Christ,
the hideous wood
is beautified,
timber
now bearing scars
of the pivotal Kingdom event,
the carpenter’s imprint
on the cross,
the patterning
of the one who hung there
cardinal red
on the grain,
the Master craftsman
fashioning
his final piece
in wood,
a beautiful work
of eternal
significance.

The Crushing

crushed
he said

this
from one
so ultra calm
so quietly unflappable

my soul
is crushed with grief
crushed to the point of death

not that he needed
to voice it
his whole body language
betrayed the truth of it

suddenly
everything had changed
our Passover celebration
become
a veritable nightmare
the flight to freedom
revisited
as headlong plunge
into deep despair

what kind of God was this
this Abba
whom he cried to?

what kind of God
would choose to crush
salvation
into being?

what kind of God
was this?

Bittersweet Gethsemane

olives
rained down like bullets
on the ground,
branches
violently shook

his face
contorted in pain,
his clenched fists
roared against the tree
as if flailing in anguish ‘
against the totality
of his creation,
the whole
sorry mess of it
and this moment
it had led him to

his was a tough love,
love of the toughest
most bittersweet kind

and now,
his whole life
hurtling towards its climax,
his divinity
fought the intensity
of mortal weakness
and his human face
revealed itself

Abba
take this cup away


anger
grief
vulnerability
wrestled with the calling

tensions
exploded from within him
as the inner battle
raged

until finally
it was over

he was spent

his whole body
slumped,
relaxed exhaustion
overcame him
and the greater calling
restored itself
to its rightful place
within his mind

in a whisper
the words came

yet not my will
but yours
be done

peace
strengthened him

the hour
had come

Private Moment

. Mark 11.11

silently
reflectively,
adulation of the crowd
still ringing in his ears,
he climbed
the temple steps
entered once more
the place
that had drawn him back,
the holy space
that had been ever drawing him
over thirty three years of life
and long generations of history

destiny
held him
in a private moment
inside the great
echoing silence
of the sacred space

it was late
it was lonely
the end was near

the crowds didn’t understand

silently,
before the
place of sacrifice,
his hands
caressing the altar
as one would a woman,
he remembered Isaac’s son
and the sparing
and knew
that this time
it had to be different

and the coldness
of the polished stone
shivered through him

it was cold
it was late
it was lonely

the end

was near

Salvation Symphony

resonant
ringing sound
of hammer head on nail
echoes
across Calvary
reverberates
vibrant
victorious
cymbal-like
first clashing note
of the final
carefully orchestrated movement
of God’s symphony
of Salvation

metal
drives through flesh
and crimson life-blood
of the Christ
spills out
upon the timber altar
of the cross

the finale
has begun

and the unflinching Saviour
turns his head
to watch the lead percussionist
steady the nail

and He sees

that it is good

Blood on the Ground

when her eyes
could bear
to look at him no more
her head
dropped
and finally
her brave composure shattered
a great releasing
flow of grief
consumed her shaking body

and John’s
strong arms
wrapped themselves tightly round her
sharing the pain
holding her together
in her brokenness

and when the tears
had run their painful course
her vacant eyes
stared blindly
through the watery veil
at the bloodstains
by her feet
the blood of her son
colouring the Golgotha dust

and her mind went back
to another time
another lonely place
when it was her blood
staining a dusty stable floor
blood of her womb
outpoured
in his birthing

to a time
when she had made
her sacrifice
given her virginal womb
to the purposes of God

and as another
deep
red
globule
fell to the ground
she knew
that this was her blood too
another sacrifice by her
and part of her
was dying with him

and another tear
broke loose

Red

poem inspired by this image:
by Joerg Lehmann
(c) Pinotage wines


the true vine
weeps

deep
red
juice

down the timbers
of the cross

blood of the new covenant
pouring itself
from his wounds

the fruit of his life
crushed
into rich
red
eucharistic wine

sacrificing
the one
true life
to give life

the vine
weeps

deep
celebratory
red

The Timber

with the poignant love
of one who knows
the pain that is to come

he fingered
the grain of the wood
touched it
reverently
felt every nuance of its texture
ran his hand
along its roughness
gazed
at its patterning

saw deep below
its splintered outer surface
to the beauty
at its heart

pressed his face
against the timber
felt the strength of it
breathed in the smell of it
buried his mind
in its touch and its scent

a soft
woody fragrance
stirring echoes
of childhood

memories of
the toddler in the sawdust
at his father’s feet

images of youth
the young man
learning the carpenter’s trade
but knowing
always knowing
there was other work
for him to do

and his mother
speaking softly
telling
and re-telling
again and again
always with affection
the story
of the manger

a crib at his birth
a cross at his death

timber
framing his life

his whole history
flashed across his mind
as he fingered
held
breathed in the scent of
the wood
memories
mingling with the pain

there was something
completely right
about this death which was his destiny

he was ready

now was the hour

he stooped
to shoulder a piece of wood
for one last time

The Cup

a rule breaker
to the end
inviting us to drink blood
it was only wine of course
but he was saying
it was his blood

somehow
that was significant
yet it went against the grain
of all our Jewish sensitivities
to drink
blood

it was another mystery
another conundrum

we couldn’t begin to get our thoughts
around the questions
racing through our heads
that night

only later
a very long time later
did the faintest
chink of understanding
start to filter through

a sacrificial lamb

the ultimate
never needed again
sacrificial lamb

that’s what he was

pouring his blood out

for us

In The Straw

from my new Christmas manuscript:

and the Saviour
lay
in the straw

devoid of comfort
but for the warm, soft breast
of she who birthed him

without material wealth,
his earthly parents
homeless
poor
and soon
to be on the run
because of him

a penniless King

the Saviour
lay
in the straw

child of the girl
who risked the scandal
of unmarried pregnancy
for him

son of the God
who turned the world’s values
upside down
who loved us far too much
to leave us
as we were

son
of Love
who created us
to love like him

and came as the Saviour
who lay in the straw

Deep

simple words to lead into stillness

deep
journey deep
to the place beyond words

sink
slowly sink
to the silence within

let the Christ
who is in you
rise up to meet you

deep
journey deep
into him

Heaven Comes Home

a poem birthed during my time of reflective writing this Christmas:

the tiny miracle
of God-made-small
drinks at the warm
soft breast
of the girl
whose womb
has nurtured him
to life

taking the risk
of placing himself
in the care of his own
creation
God births himself
through a wonderful act
of love

divinity
kisses
humanity
staking the future
on Mary’s
yes

heaven
comes home
to earth